PnF Episode 16

Episode Title: My Dinner With The Johnsons

It all started one day with an exhilarated Candace talking to her friend Jenny on the phone. Usually, Stacy is the one Candace talks to on the phone for this. But today was a bit different. After all, Jenny wasn't around as much on the show. So you get the idea.
"Jenny, you're not gonna believe this! This is the moment in history that is going to be recorded forever! Jeremy's parents invited us over to their house for dinner tonight! And I'm going to be sitting next to Jeremy! How lucky can I get?" she told her good secondary friend.
"That's really great to know, Candace. But why are you telling me this? Shouldn't you be telling Stacy instead?" asked the seldom seen girl.
"Hey, the writers wanted to put YOU in a bit more. So, well, here you are! Besides, maybe it was a smart idea to take a break from Stacy for a while. You know, give you more of a chance to shine?" Candace answered with breaking the fourth wall.
"Oh! Well, it is nice knowing that I get to be on a bit more!" Jenny said blushing.
"Now, I gotta get going! My nose isn't gonna powder itself!" Candace said as she hung up.
Jenny hung up and waved to the viewers.
Candace was busy getting into her special rendezvous outfit for these occasions. She slipped them on.
"Ah...haven't worn this outfit since that croquet incident in the park," she said to herself.

At the Johnson house, Jeremy was setting the table for their guests.
"Salad fork here, butter knife there, loaf of bread go to center of table, and a plate for everybody and everybody with a plate," he said as he finished. "There we go. The table is set for dinner tonight."
Suzy, Jeremy's sister, was getting ready for dinner herself. She had quite a few tricks up her sleeves for tormenting Candace.
"This is gonna be a dinner that will give that brother stealing hyena her just desserts," she said in her sinister tone.

Back at the house of our heroes, Phineas and Ferb were getting suited up themselves.
"Now this, Ferb, is the way to make a fancy appearance at a dinner at a friend's house," Phineas proclaimed. The two were really gussied up for the big dinner at the Johnsons'. It was polite to dress like that.
"Aww...you two look so adorable I'd eat you up!" Linda teased.
"Well, we're not being served on a silver platter tonight, mom!" Phineas teased back.
Ferb was so embarrassed with the joke.
"Now, I'm sure you'll remember your manners when we're over there. We don't want to cause any trouble," said Lawrence.
"No. No we don't..." said Phineas.
"By the way, where's that platypus Perry?" Linda wondered about the family pet.

Perry went over to his lair via the family portrait in the den. Dropping through the chute, he landed nice and easy.
"Oh, hey, Agent P! Get this about Doofenshmirtz! He says he's a found a new neighbor, and it might just be the person he was looking for! That means..." said Monogram who started to hold it for something funny. "...HE'S TAKING YET ANOTHER WHACK AT LOVE!!!" He couldn't help but laugh. "MAN, I LOVE THOSE TIMES WHEN THERE'S A GIRLFRIEND OF HIS THAT HE TRIES TO IMPRESS, AND YOU KNOW IT'LL END IN DISASTER ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!" he was still cracking up. Then his hip gave out. "Oh, the pain...I'M GONNA DIE LAUGHING!" Monogram finished with a joke. Perry just slowly backed away from his insanely hearty superior to go see Doofenshmirtz.

The Flynn-Fletcher family arrived at the Johnson house at 6 P.M.
"Now remember, kids. We'll be here for a few hours to have a nice, quiet dinner with pleasant conversation and play a few good games like good friends and neighbors do. And Candace, try not to ogle Jeremy too much at the dinner table," Linda instructed.
"Okay, mom!" said the kids. Everyone got out of the car and Lawrence rang the doorbell. The person who answered was the elderly grandma Hildegarde.
"Oh, hello, everyone! You made it. Dinner is just about done. Come in! Come in!" she greeted. The family went in.
"So, is Jeremy here?" Candace asked Hildegarde.
"He's just about done washing up before dinner," said Hildegarde.
Then came Suzy.
"Hello, everyone!" she greeted in her adorable demeanor. "I'm very happy you could all make it!"
Phineas, Ferb, Linda, and Lawrence all "Awwed" at the sight of adorable little Suzy Johnson. But not Candace. She knew that underneath that precious, wonderful, adorable, lovable smile was the twisted soul of a demented little spoiled child bent on ruining her love life.
She may have everyone else fooled, but I know her true nature! That little doll face doesn't fool me, Candace thought.
When everyone else went to the dinner table to get ready, Suzy and Candace were alone and Suzy turned to her evil face.
"So, Candace, are you gonna sit next to Jeremy? Just wanting to be sure..." said the Johnson girl.
"Don't you dare ruin this night for me you little freak!" Candace retorted.
"Uh, hello! I'M JEREMY'S FAVORITE GIRL! Like he'd believe you about me!" Suzy stated correctly.
Jeremy then came down greeting Candace and the two girls smiled when he came down.
"I'm glad you could make it, Candace. I hope you and your family have fun and enjoy tonight's dinner," he greeted his girlfriend.
Candace smirked at Suzy.

"DOOFENSHMIRTZ LOOKING LIKE A LOVESICK DUDE!" the DEI jingle singers sang as Doof was more relaxed and calm now. Perry came in and saw his nemesis sitting in his chair in his apartment when he came in through busting in through the roof.
"Oh, Perry the Platypus...I think I finally found the woman for me..." said a dazed and hearty Heinz. Perry was so confused, ever after being told about the stuff from Monogram. This led to Doof explaining the events and a flashback.
"Today, a new evil scientist moved into that old skyscraper across the street and I thought it would leave me with some competition. So I decided to give the newbie a taste of my Away-inator to get rid of said competition until I saw...her..."
It showed a lovely scientist with long blond hair, charming ocean eyes, and lips as black as Vanessa's leather coat.
"Her name...was Cynthia Malefactor...an evil scientist and an ornate woman. I welcomed her to the neighborhood with a batch of cookies shaped like hearts and a bouquet of black roses. She was a little flattered with it, but thought I was a little crazy for the obvious reasons for the gifts."
The flashback ended.
"But I tend to make her mine soon enough! I'll woo her with song, write poetry for her, even send an embarrassing text message with hearts and flowers all over it. Heinz and Cynthia Doofenshmirtz! A dark heart and a romance of bane! I like it."
Perry was so hopeless of his nemesis in love with yet another crazy.

The table in the Johnson dining room was ready and the families got together for eating. But Suzy placed a whoopee cushion right under Candace's chair. Candace was sitting between Jeremy and Suzy. It was good because of Jeremy and bad because of Suzy.
"Candace! Come on! It's time to eat!" Linda called out.
Candace made her entrance.
"Good evening, everyone," she said making her way to her chair. As she sat down, she set off Suzy's whoopee cushion thus making the classic fart sound. She saw everyone looking at her.
"WHOA! THAT WAS A BIG ONE!" shouted a surprised Hildegarde.
Candace blushed and said,
"Oh no! I'm really sorry about that!"
"Candace! You really shouldn't do that at the table! That's not good manners!" said Suzy.
Candace had a feeling it was just a prank of hers. That was when she turned and saw the air tube for the cushion and saw it was just a prank all right.
"Candace? Are you all right?" Jeremy asked.
"Yes, I'm fine, Jeremy..." Candace answered.
So, everyone ate their dinner, Candace keeping an eye on Suzy and Suzy doing the same with Candace. Neither of them were letting each other catch on to their works.
Soon, dinner ended and dessert was going to be a while.

Doofenshmirtz and Perry went over to the skyscraper across the street.
"OH, CYNTHIA!!!!!" Heinz called out.
"Oh, no. It's that nutjob of a schnitzel lover from earlier," Cynthia said to herself referring to Heinz. She went to her window and saw Heinz was holding a sign up with a picture of them in a field of flowers barefoot.
"CYNTHIA! CHECK OUT THIS PICTURE OF US!" said Heinz.
"PLEASE, GO AWAY, HEINZ!" Cynthia blustered.
Heinz got out his guitar and started performing the first verse of "Evil Love" to his new love who was very stressed from his wooing of weirdness.
"Love was once a crazy dream...now it's my new evil scheme..." he sang. That was when Cynthia threw a vase at him and smacked him in the head. Perry made that face that said "That's gotta hurt".

It was now family game time. The adults were playing Parcheesi, and the kids were playing charades.
Over with the kids, Suzy was getting ready to pelt Candace with a water balloon. She just waited for the boys to get a drink. They then got up for that.
"Okay, the coast is clear..." said Suzy. She then threw the water balloon at Candace, who was completely unaware until SMACK! she was hit.
"Tsk tsk tsk...looks like you've been watered down!" said the pun making Suzy.
"Oh, ha ha...I may not be able to prove it yet, but you'll see that Jeremy will find out sooner or later. I'm just gonna ignore you!" Candace replied.
"Jeremy will never know, because I am the master of disguise!" Suzy stated. This led to a song cue.
Song: I'm the Master of Disguise
Genre: Low Tone Villainy with a beat of Up Pitch Show Tune
Montage: Suzy demonstrates her skills of being cute for covering up her evil side around certain people at the certain face. Also clips from past appearances from One Good Scare Ought To Do It!, Crack That Whip!, and Comet Kermilian.
Lyrics

*evil tone*
Suzy: I'm the master of disguise
I can vanish from your eyes
For the difference on my face
Tells you of the current pace
And it covers me from lies

*cute tone*
It's so easy to deceive you
With just a sneaky little trick
And to make you believe
It's character that I pick
For my enemies I take off my disguise
And I'll be cute for my friends to hide my lies

*evil tone*
I'm as sneaky as can be
No one's sneakier than me
I'll get away with what I do
And there's no evidence for you
I can torment and I'll stay free

*cute tone*
So it's hard to decide now
If I'm sour or just sweet
But no matter how hard there
You know that I can't be beat
I'll just use the right face for the eyes
Because I'm the master of disguise

Surprise! It's me!

*end song*

"That was the worst song I ever heard," said a little petrified Candace.
Suzy smiled and said,
"Oh, I love being bad."

Doof was now sending an email to Cynthia. It was a gushy gooshy one too. She checked it out.
"What the?" she asked. It was so gushy that it was hard to be written and pronounced for writing. "Oh geez! Does this guy ever know when to quit?"
"She's GOTTA love that email and then me!" Heinz said to Perry. Cynthia went to her window again and yelled,
"GET OUTTA MY SIGHT! I DON'T LIKE YOU THAT WAY!"
Heinz then started crying and couldn't believe it.
"OH, WHO AM I KIDDING? I'M NOT ONE FOR LOVE! I'VE DONE ALL I COULD!" he lamented. "IT JUST GOES TO SHOW, PERRY THE PLATYPUS, THAT LOVE IS SOMETHING NOT EVERYONE CAN ENJOY!"
Cynthia was walking away from the sobbing when, suddenly, she slipped on her misplaced knitting spool and slipped out the window screaming. Heinz was waving his hands up.
"I JUST WANTED TO FIND SOMEONE TO SPREAD DARKNESS AND BANE OVER THE TRI-STATE AREA WITH ME!" he cried.
Then suddenly, Cynthia landed right in his arms! The bumbling Doof saved the gorgeous genius.
"Heinz...you...you saved me..." Cynthia stated as she blushed.
"So I did..." said Heinz.
Cynthia then found that flaming attraction to Heinz that was probably not going to happen but happened anyway. Cynthia didn't hesitate. She yelled,
"PUCKER UP!!!"
With that, she and Heinz engaged in a romantic moment. Perry kinda saw this rather wrong. He didn't know Heinz would actually have charm for a hot woman. But he also decided that this love shouldn't be broken.

Candace was drying off the water from the balloon and decided that Suzy was really not going to get away with it. Even if she did, at least it wasn't going to break her and Jeremy apart.
"Okay...it's no big deal...our love is still strong..." she said. Then Suzy placed a bar of soap at the door out of the bathroom causing Candace to slip on it and crash right into the wall of the den.
"Candace, did you have some sort of an accident?" Lawrence asked her.
"If there's one accident I can't stand, it's an accident that leads to a use of slapstick," Candace stated.
"Why did you hit the wall?" Hildegarde asked.
"Seems to me like a conundrum like that would be a result of exhaustion to the brain," said Suzy.
"What?" asked a confused Hildegarde.
"BUBBLE!" said adorable mode Suzy.
"You know, maybe we should go home. Forget about dessert," said Linda.
"NO! I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SAY GOODBYE TO JEREMY!" said Candace.

Heinz and Cynthia went back to DEI for some coffee. Perry was serving them.
"Thanks, Perry the Platypus. For a nemesis who is an egg laying mammal, you're all right," said Doofenshmirtz.
"And you're a pretty cute platypus, too," said Cynthia. "So, what ahve you tried, Heinz?"
"Well, I did all sorts of stuff. I tried to reverse rotation of the earth by moving the eastern border in a western direction, eliminate all lawn gnomes in the tri-state area due to a dark past, deflate all inflatables, win a science fair with a baking soda volcano while wearing lederhosen, make everyone's voices higher so mine would be lower, dig to China to make a super toll highway for millions, and even make my own evil country to get away from it all. But I'm glad to have met you," said a Doofenshmirtz of remembrance.
Perry was enjoying Heinz finally going with love. He decided to leave now.
"Bye for now, Perry the Platypus!" Heinz said as a farewell waving from the hallway. Then when he went back to Cynthia, he tripped over his shoelace due to the aglet and hit the button for his Away-inator like he originally planned and zapped Cynthia's new building to the dimension the Away-inator always sends them. The baby alien used the skyscraper as his new toy chest.
"Heinz...my building..." said Cynthia.
"Oh boy," said Heinz.
Cynthia ran off in tears from the loss of her headquarters.
"I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU AGAIN!" she cried as she ran out the door.
"But...but...oh, why do I always always get the crazies?" Heinz asked himself.

The Flynn-Fletcher family was ready to go home.
"We're really sorry about what happened tonight. Candace tends to get a little bizarre from time to time as you can see," said Linda.
"It's rather regular for teens her age if you ask me," said Lawrence.
"Don't worry. It wasn't all that bad," said Hildegarde.
"I'm really sorry I ruined the night, Jeremy," said Candace.
"You didn't ruin it, Candace. It was actually pretty fun," said Jeremy.
"Really? Despite the farting and the slipping?" Candace asked.
"Of course. You know that was all by accident. And it's still funny as long as you're in one piece. So I say it was a great visit you guys made. Especially with you," Jeremy admitted.
Candace blushed and said,
"Thank you very much. It was a great night," said Candace.
The family got in the car. Isabella saw Phineas in his outfit from the visit and just about swooned over it.
Suzy looked over and saw Candace driving off home. Her plans failed as usual.
"You may have won this round...but mark my words, you'll rue the day you toy with Suzy Johnson!" Suzy said in her evil tone. Then she heard Isabella sigh dreamily over Phineas's outfit.
"What's with you?" Suzy asked Isabella.
"Let's just say..." swooned Isabella, "...clothes DEFINITELY make the man."

*fade out*