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SSBGT Episode 3

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Disclaimer: This episode of Super Smash Bros contains a series of extreme stunts performed by video game characters! Do not try any of what you see here at home. Seriously, you could get really messed up!

Andrew: Last time on Super Smash Bros Global Trip
*recap*
We began our world traveling musical tournament with some of the finest characters ever created. They had style, they had grace, they knew to admire my face. The singing wasn't that bad. Our first stop was in the city of love, Paris, France. There, first the contestants made their way over and/or through the Eiffel Tower where they won special items for their next challenge: a race to the grand arche at La Defense. Despite having a huge disadvantage from the start of challenge two, Team Hero managed to make a come from behind victory. Ness and Dawn also swapped teams for specific reasons. In the end, Team Andrew Is, Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy was forced to send someone home due to part of their item not getting there entirely. In the end, Jigglypuff's goose was cooked because one was eaten, thus leaving Team Andrew Is Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy with nine. And so, we bid adieu to the city of love and fly off
*end recap*
What exotic location are we headed to this time? Who's going to get the boot to defeat? Find out tonight for yourself. This is...SUPER! SMASH! BROS! *musical tone* GLOBAAAAAAL TRIIIIIIIP!

*theme sequence, commercial break, episode continues*

Episode 3: Spain In The Neck

The teams Team Brainiac and Team Andrew Is Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy were sitting in the losers' bedroom after not finishing the challenge in Paris. They were having some problems with the material building for it. It felt like it could break apart anytime. That was when someone smelled something.
"What's that stench?" Zelda asked. She looked down and saw Pikachu eating something. "Pikachu, what are you eating?"
"Oh, I picked up some stinky cheese before we left Paris. Thought I could use a little souvenir," said Pikachu.
"Oh. Makes sense," said Zelda.
"This is not one of my favorite moments," said Lucas.
"I'll say. This plane could break something at any minute," said Knuckles. That idea took the words right out of the plane's structure, as a patch in the wall was torn off and the two losing teams were being sucked into the hole.
"NO! DEDEDE IS TOO ROYAL AND MALLET INDUCED TO DIE!" Dedede yelled in the third person.
"SOMEONE PATCH UP THAT THING!" said Rosalina.
Bowser noticed his safely line was coming off and it snapped. He was the first to be sent flying. He covered up the hole in the wall and everyone was safe.
"Well, that worked at least," said Daisy.
"Is everyone all right?" asked Dedede. That was when he heard a muffling sound. He got up and saw he was sitting on Meowth by accident. "Whoops. Sorry about that, Meowth," said Dedede.
"No sweat. I'm a cat. We have a long life span," Meowth responed.

Stall Confessional

Meowth: *sighs* One life down, eight to go. All thanks to Dedede's ass.

End confessional

Bowser then asked,
"Uh, guys, as much as I enjoy saving your lives for a change instead of filling them with misery and demise...COULD SOMEONE PLEASE GET OUT OF THIS HOLE!?"
He wasn't happy about it.

Meanwhile, in the first class winner room, Team Hero was celebrating their victory with a can of pop for each.
"That was a marvelous victory, team!" said Mario.
"You said it, brother! We had a disadvantage at first, but we pulled off a miracle," said Luigi.
"Any obstacle can be overcome when we work together as a team," said Mega Man.
Kirby was getting some food from the pantry. Yoshi wanted some too.
"Can I have some?" asked Yoshi.
"Do I look like I share with a dino-myte dumbbell?" Kirby answered. They started grabbing the food only to then split it 50-50 after the struggle.
"Whatever works," they said with a shrug.

Later, everyone was at the cafeteria getting ready to hear their next challenge. Andrew arrived to explain everything.
"Good day, everybody! Today is a very special challenge for you all," said Andrew.
"Is this going to be an elimination challenge or a reward challenge?" Toon Link asked.
"Very good questions, Toon Link. And...I ain't tellin' ya," Andrew answered. He continued, "Our next destination is...SPAIN!"
Galleom was then shown as a Mariachi singer doing a hat dance. Toon Llink interrupted,
"OH, COME ON! THAT'S A MEXICAN outfit!"
"Thank you, Toon Link. Now, anyone who refuses to sing-" Andrew continued only to be interrupted by Toon Link again.
"What really irks me about this is that you didn't spend enough time making it culturally correct!" said Toon Link.
That was when Andrew and Galleom gleamed to each other. Galleom threw iron ball items to the flying characters: Pit, Tails, Kirby, and Rosalina so that they couldn't fly. Then he charaged right at the door and then all the contestants got sucked out and started plummeting without a parachute!
"YOU KNOW, WE COULD HAVE JUST LANDED THE PLANE INSTEAD!!!" Andrew suggested.
"WHAT?! THAT'S TOO BORING!!!" Galleom responded.
As everyone was plummeting to their doom, the musical number chime rang and it was not a good time.
"THIS IS THE WOOOOORST POSSIBLE TIME!" Zelda complained.
"COME ON! SING FOR YOUR LIVES ALREADY!" Andrew ordered. The contestants had no choice. They sang the musical number about facing death in the face and what they still want to do.

Song: Before We Die
Montage: Everyone sings about what they want to do before they do, what they could use to cushion their landing, and Mario dives inside a ring formed by the other contestants.

Lyrics

Tails: We're singing as we're falling!
Donkey Kong: While some are cannon-balling!
Sonic: Yeah!
Ganondorf: Our lives begin to flash before our eyes!

Mario and Luigi: We might just go ka-blooey!
Dawn and Pit: Get smushed and become gooey!
Everyone: Except there's tons we wanna do before we die!

Dedede: Yokozuna!
Dawn: Fashion model!
Lucas: Make it home to see my poppa!
Mega Man: Hold the world's peace!
Lucario: Jump a canyon!
Funky: Mistake a Golduck for Kappa!
Knuckles: Lead a choir!
Bowser: Wall destroyer!
Olimar: Kick a bully's face with lots of sand!
Ganondorf: Dragon tamer!
Sonic: World class gamer!
Meowth: Best behaved cat in all the land!

Ike: But first we must cease dropping!
Zelda: Our goal here would be stopping!
Yoshi: Before we smash into the ground from the sky!
Daisy: Smash into little pieces!
Kirby: Heads merged with out feetses!
Bowser: That would really suck and here's why!

Rosalina: We'd like to keep on living!
Ganondorf: Andrew, we hope you're giving:
Yoshi: Some wings!
Toon Link: A jetpack!
Dawn: A warp pipe!
Sonic: Tons of jelly!
Pikachu: Waterbeds!
Popo: A trampoline!
Nana: Springy shoes!
Pit: Snorlax belly!
Peach: Master Hand!
Luigi: Bubble plant!
Peach: I change to bubbles too!
Lucas: Momma!
Donkey Kong: Marshmallows!
Mario: NO! A plain mattress will dooooo!

Everyone: Cause there's still so much to do before we die! Yeah, we said it!
There's still so much to do, there's still so much to do, there's still so much to do before we die! Yeah!

Mario: Yeah!

*end song*

Soon, everyone made it to Spain. And what was used to soften their landing? A giant plate of a giant piece of flan. They all landed on it and got stuck inside the spanish custard. They emerged to the surface.
"Well, that was quite a scary experience," said Kirby.
"So, this is Spain. This place is quite overwhelming. I gotta pull myself together!" said Meowth.
"I can speak a little Spanish," said Ganondorf. Then he said, "Peach, una visión de la belleza más delicada que una rosa" he asked Peach.
"What does that mean?" Peach asked.
"It means, "Peach, a vision of beauty more delicate than a rose"," Ganondorf answered. Peach blushed at that translation.
"Thanks," she said. Andrew entered dressed like a matador and said,
"Bienvenidos! Which is Spanish for "Welcome"!"
"Well, at least he speaks the language," said Toon Link.
"Today's challenge is all about some of Spain's most treasured culture past times. That's why I'm in this nice matador outfit," said Andrew.
Everyone noticed they were in a bullfighting coliseum.
"We're in a bullfighting coliseum, aren't we?" Mario asked.
"Yes. Yes we are. In fact, that's the first part of the challenge. A bull fight with some of the most well trained and savage Tauros in all the land!" Andrew answered.
Galleom opened up the pen and led the Tauros to their starting ground.
"Careful. You mess with the Tauros, you get the horns," said Galleom.
"This is going to be ugly," said Bowser.
"Now, the team has to keep safe from the Tauros at all times. If you get booted out of the coliseum by a headbutt, you're out! The team that stays in the coliseum the longest will get a 30 second head start in the next challenge," Andrew explained. "Now then...iUno! iDos! iTres!"
Galleom let the Tauros go and they charged at the contestants.
"AYE!" yelled Pit. They all started running around. They grabbed red capes and started to use them as protection.
"Come on, Torro! Bring it on!" said Sonic. That was when he and the bull Pokemon went colliding for each other, but the Tauros headbutted Sonic out of the coliseum.

Stall Confessional

Sonic: *holding an ice pack on his head* Okay, that was a bunch of bull I did there. No pun intended...OH, THAT ZEN HEADBUTT REALLY HURTS! OOOOOOW!

End confessional

Team Brainiac had a ray gun behind their cape. They waved it.
"We'll be trapped," said Knuckles.
They Tauros came charging at them catching their cape and ray gun. It slammed its tail on the ground and shot a laser. And then another. It got a nasty idea.
"Oh, crap!" said Daisy.
"Whose dumb idea was this?" Pikachu asked.
"Yours!" Zelda retorted.
"Well, I didn't think this would happen!" Pikachu responded.
They started running from the Tauros that shot lasers out of its horn, with Team Brainiac avoid what they could. But it ran out of ammo eventually and threw the ray gun away.
"That was the best part! Laser shooting bull horns!" said Andrew.
"Yup. That was my favorite part too," said Galleom.

Team AIRRRRS was backed up in a corner. That was when Popo and Nana got out their hammers.
"Torro!" they shouted. They waved their capes, hid their hammers, waited for the bulls to charge, and then smacked them clear across the coliseum, also sending Team Hero and Team Brainiac out of the coliseum.
"Ole!" said the other members of Team AIRRRRS.
"And the winners of the bullfighting challenge are...Team I Am Really, Really, Really, Really sexy!" said Andrew. "That means, they get 30 seconds ahead in the next event!"
"All right!" said Popo and Nana.
The others came back from their little knockout and Luigi said,
"Is this what we've been reduced to?! HUMILIATING EACH OTHER!?"
Andrew signed off for commercial and said,
"So, which team will be doing a tango of victory tonight? And which will flamenco one out of the game? iHay más acción caliente por venir, cuando nos volvemos! Meaning, "There's more hot action to come, when we come back"!"

*fade out to commercial; come back from break*

The contestants were now at a starting line in the outskirts of Pamplona.
"Welcome back to Super Smash Bros Global Trip! We're in the lovely town of Plampona, Spain, where the contestants are about to run with all their might to the finish line before the Tauros stampede them over!" said Andrew.
"WHAT?! THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE FUN!" Ness complained.
"Who said it'd be fun? Now, Team Andrew is Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy won the bullfighting challenge, so they get a 30 second head start. As for the others, well...sucks to be you!" said Andrew.
"I'm not so good at running," said Ike.
Funky held Zelda over his shoulder.
"Don't worry, Zelda! I will protect you!" he said.
"PUT ME DOWN, YOU JERK!!!" she complained.
"Now, Team AIRRRRS, get the lead out! Your 30 seconds starts now!" Andrew ordered.  Team AIRRRRS was off.
"With this head start, they'll never catch us," said Popo.
"I'll say," said Nana.
Then, back at the starting line, Andrew pressed the button on an air horn and got the contestants going and the bulls to charge at them. Sonic wasn't moving super fast because he thought he needed to stay with his team.
"Aye carumba!" he stated seeing the Tauros closing in. He said it in the style of Bart Simpson.
"Man! Who stuck a Beedrill up their butts!?" Mario complained.
"I don't know! Just keep running!!!" said Mega Man.
They also tried attacking the Tauros, but Mega Man's Mega Buster, Mario's Fireball, Peach's vegetables, and even Ike's Aether all had no effect.
"When they start charging, no one is safe," said Andrew.
Meanwhile, Team AIRRRRS was having an impressive lead.
"We should pace ourselves now. There's no way those dorks or the rampaging boy cows are gonna catch us," said Ganondorf. So, they slowed down. But it was a bad idea. The other team came from behind and decided to sprint it.
"Don't worry! I got this!" said Pikachu. He turned and unleashed a Thunderbolt onto the Tauros. All had no effect.
"You idiot! They're still charging!" Bowser yelled.
"What gave you the idea?" Zelda asked still being carried by Funky.
Pikachu then said,
"Holy s-" then he got stampeded over by the wild Tauros.
Sonic then grabbed the other members of his team and rocketed them to the finish line.
"Why didn't you just do that in the first place?" Ike complained.
"It would have ruined the adrenaline of the chase," Sonic answered.
"Well, we made it first," said Ness.
"That's right! And that means Team Hero wins this part of the challenge!" said Andrew.
They all cheered for it. But then, they saw something in one of they alleys poking out in the corner. It was a silhouette of something round with pointy ears. It had glowing red eyes that were really round.
"Was that...?" Luigi asked.
"No, it couldn't have been," said Sonic.
Team Brainiac was short on player: Pikachu, who came crawling flattened and springing like an accordion.
"Aye aye aye," said Meowth.
"Nice move," said a sarcastic Daisy.
"I'm okay," said Pikachu.

Stall Confessional

Pikachu: Okay, I'm not having a very good day today. But it can only get better. Right?

End confessional

*cut to commercial; return from break*

It was time for the last part of the challenge.
"And now, we give to you our final part: a flamenco finale! Each team will pick a player to dance on this floor and see who can dance the best while staying on the platform at all times. Now, choose wisely. The team that wins this challenge will be in the first class cabin this week while the worst dancing team has to send someone home. Good luck!" said Andrew.

Team Hero
"Okay, anyone know a good tap dancing routine?" Mario asked.
"I can do it! I have a good sway in my heels," said Sonic.
"Then you'll dance for us," said Mario.

Team Brainiac
"Okay, I know I said it before, but I really will do a flamenco dance this time!" said Bowser.
"You promise? No reading my diary again?" Zelda complained.
"Yo, that was then, this is now. I know what I'm doing," said Bowser. "Sheesh. Do one little sneak maneuver and people think it'll happen again. Aye aye aye," said Bowser.

Team AIRRRRS
"Dancing? Anyone?" asked Rosalina.
"I'll do it. I seem the most likely," said Lucario.
"Okay then, dance us to victory!" said Rosalina.

With that, the dancing began. Andrew and Galleom played a Spanish guitar version of "Before We Die" for the music. Sonic, Bowser, and Lucario began tapping their toes and clacking castanets to the beat. They were all doing so good.
"Wow..." said Team Hero.
"Ooh..." said Tram Brainiac.
"Ah..." said Team AIRRRRS.
"This is where I win us the gold," said Bowser. That was when he stepped on something. It was Pikachu's tail!
"YEEEEOW!" Pikachu screamed. The scream through Bowser off his balance, AND the stage.
Sonic and Lucario were the last two dancers dancing at the end of the song and it was over.
"And with that, we come to a great end! Galleom, who do you think was the best dancer?" Andrew asked his fellow judge.
Galleom thought about it and said,
"I have to go with Lucario for Team Andrew Is Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy. He had the most panache out of them all."
"Then that means Team Andrew Is Really, Really, Really, Really, Sexy wins!" said Andrew.
Team AIRRRRS celebrated. Popo and Nana highfived each other.
"And who do you think was the worst?" asked Andrew.
"I'd say the koopa guy for Team Brainiac. That slip up there really cost him," said Galleom.
"Then I guess a Brainiac is going home tonight!" said Andrew.
"I guess that means it's not a reward challenge," said Toon Link.
The other Brainiacs looked at Pikachu disdainfully.
"What?" Pikachu asked.

On the plane, Team Brainiac was the unlucky team to vote someone off.
"In order to eliminate a teammate, take their passport and stamp it. Got it?" Andrew explained.
Everyone nodded.

Stall Confessional

Zelda: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Ganondorf: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Bowser: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Daisy: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Pikachu: *stamps Bowser's passport*
Funky: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Knuckles: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Dawn: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Meowth: **stamps Pikachu's passport*
Pit: *stamps Pikachu's passport*
Tauros: *stamps Pikachu's passport*

End confessional

"Now, if I call your name, you get a barf bag and you're safe for today. The bags go to the following..." Andrew said. The people who got called on got hit in the face by the bag. Andrew said,
"Pit...Dawn...Ganondorf...Daisy...Knuckles...Meowth...Zelda...Funky..."
And it was down to Bowser and Pikachu. It was soon revealed who was the lucky one to stay. Andrew said,
"...Bowser." And Bowser got hit in the face with his bag.
"Oh no! That means..." said Pikachu.
"Yep. Time for you to take a drop through the Sky Hatch of Failure!" said Andrew. Galleom opened it up and charged Pikachu out of the plane with his parachute.
"THANKS FOR PLAYING WITH US, BRO!" Andrew called to Pikachu. Then he heard Pikachu yell something and thought,
"AWW! HE'S PRAISING ME FOR MY FINE HOSTING! NO, WAIT! HE'S TELLING ME TO TAKE A HIKE! SORRY ABOUT THAT!"
The door closed.
"Good riddance to that shorty," said Bowser.
"You bet!" said Ganondorf.

Sign off

Andrew: Will Team Andrew Is Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy be the new coming champions? Will Team Brainiac ever bask in the glory of first class? How did Galleom and I learn to play the Spanish guitar from out of nowhere? All this and more! Next time! On Super! Smash! Bros! Global Trip!

*fade out*
And now, I present to you episode three of Super Smash Bros Global Trip. We travel to the realm of flamenco and great bull competition: Spain. There, the contestants take on Tauros in a big bullfight, run with them in a running of the bull event, and wrap it up with a one on one on one flamenco dance off.

Super Smash Bros and other characters belong to their respective owners, not me.

Team Hero
Mario
Luigi
Peach
Mega Man
Yoshi
Kirby
Ike
Donkey Kong
Ness
Sonic

Team Brainiac
Bowser
Ganondorf
Dawn
Pit
Daisy
Zelda
Funky
Knuckles
Meowth

Team Andrew Is Really, Really, Really, Really Sexy
Rosalina
Popo
Nana
Tails
Lucario
Lucas
Toon Link
Olimar
Dedede
© 2010 - 2024 DandyAndy1989
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Mannips's avatar
LOL I see what you did THAR!
It's really epic.